By Chinenye Nwaogu
“Until you start believing in yourself, you ain’t gonna have a life.”
In this life the greatest, most consistent fan you will ever have will be your own self. Even your shadow will leave at some time. Especially when you are yet to realise most of your goals and hit the limelight you need a great dose of self confidence and self believe.
Do not ever outsource this special responsibility to someone else. Many people live constantly seeking validation, bemoaning how others feel about them, even those who you claim as benefactors may not believe in you all the time.
Seeking external validation from others seem one of the most sources of misery. People have many reasons why they will never validate your personality or even acknowledge your person.
When you operate within an environment filled with ego driven persons who want to see only themselves as super stars of their mediocre performances, you will be expecting the foul to urinate before such a person expresses any form of acknowledgement or validation towards you.
Some of the people you feel are better off than you may be secretly envying your person and will not miss any chance to put you down, so expecting such a persons to validate you will be expecting the impossible.
There are many of your peers who see you as their life’s competition, meaning that any feather to your cap looks like a loss of feather on their own cap, such a fellow will seek every opportunity to bring you down and will never acknowledge any effort of yours. In fact these group of people will ensure that they enlist the support of any willing persons to invalidate your persons.
This seem the reality of life in such environments. In environments where you experience crab mentality people tend to often only acknowledge only their own efforts, the effort of others are meaningless.
Your benefactors sometimes may not even have the emotional capacity to handle your growth. They may have been the one priming you to grow, but when the growth happens they may begin to feel threatened by your growth that they may even join the club of those invalidating you. It takes great self confidence and strong character to really validate others.
Since you do not have control of all life’s circumstances around you, somethings may not crystalize as you planned and imagined, there will be a time only you will know the veracity of what you say or believe.
Some visions looks so unrealisable that many people whom you share it with will think something is definitely wrong with your head. That is why it is dangerous to share your vision with everyone you meet.
Some people are so little and negative minded that they see impossibility in every opportunity. The only thing they see around you are negative things and reasons why you can never achieve the things you say or set out to achieve. Some of them may appear as friends, some may even be pretending to be as part of your team but their main role is just to look for every opportunity to undermine you.
This should not in any way frighten you. A gold fish cannot hide and no one has ever had the power to eclipse a shining light permanently. They can only try but they won’t succeed.
So the main thing is to firmly believe in yourself. Once you are sure of where you are headed, keep moving. There may be detours, there may be obstacles, but keep pushing. You are here for a purpose. You are completely unique and fully equipped to perform whatever positive role for which the creator sent you here. You are the only original of yourself. You are more powerful than you think. You can stretch more than you think your abilities can take you.
In event disappointments come even from trusted persons shake it off and move on. Whining is never the attribute of winners. They constantly wear the hat of optimism. Always believing for the better. They never look like what they have been through, most times achiever never look like their environment. Most times their tormentors marvel at what their lives have turned out to become.
Believe in your dreams, set goals to achieve it, pursue it in such a way as if all your life depends on it. You can and certainly experience disbelieve from those closest to you. Your own siblings, spouse, friends, etc., may express unbelief in your dreams keep keeping on, once your self confidence level is very high you can certainly achieve anything you set your heart at doing.
It may be difficult, it may be a lonely road, the path may look bleak but a determined mind cannot be stopped. One of my friends always say no one can stop a thinking mind.
Keep believing in yourself and see yourself at the top!